Castles in the Sand
by Kansas J. Miller
Summary: As CJ and Hoynes struggle to put their marriage back together, events out of their control help to bring them closer.


TITLE: Castles in the Sand  
  
AUTHOR: Kansas J. Miller  
  
PAIRING: CJ/Hoynes, minor Josh/Donna  
  
RATING: PG-15  
  
SUMMARY: As CJ and John struggle with their marriage, events out of their control help to bring them back together.  
  
BACKSTORY: It is winter of 2013, the second year of John Hoynes' second term in the White House. Sam works for the President, and Donna - who is pregnant and married to Josh - Carol, and Margaret all work for CJ's office. This story takes place directly after my last story, Life on Mars (which can be found on my site, ) In that story, CJ discovered that John was having an affair with the reporter, Katie Witt. After initially threatening a divorce, the story ended with CJ agreeing to try and work out her marriage.  
  
~*~  
  
"First Lady CJ Cregg-Hoynes appeared last evening, without the President, at a benefit to raise money for DC public school art and music programs. Nearly three quarters of a million dollars was raised for what the First Lady called 'an important part of our children's education'. This was the third public appearance Mrs. Hoynes has recently made without her husband, raising concern that there may be trouble in paradise-"  
  
"Are you kidding me?" Donna Moss's tone was full of exasperation as she snorted, cutting off Margaret's reading.  
  
The redhead looked up from the newspaper and met Donna's eyes across the desk. "No, the First Lady really did go alone last night."  
  
Donna shook her head and snatched the paper out of Margaret's hands. She was under enough stress without the added annoyance of these petty, pointless news reports. "How can *three* measly solo appearances 'raise concern' that the President and First Lady aren't getting along? How on *earth* does the press make that leap?"  
  
Margaret twisted her mouth up and shrugged. She was not privy to the intimate details of the situation between the President and First Lady, though it was obvious to the entire White House that the President's marriage was under duress. Margaret shrugged a second time, more pointedly. "It's the press, Donna. They don't need much to go on."  
  
Donna sat back and sighed, staring at the paper, her eyes lingering on the by-line. She sighed again and looked at Margaret. "Well, we might want to consider scheduling a joint event."  
  
Margaret nodded punctually and stood up. "I'm talking to Carol now."  
  
Donna watched her old friend and co-worker exit the office. When Margaret closed the door, Donna rested her hands on her pregnant stomach and began to ponder the situation. It had been nearly three weeks since CJ had learned of John's infidelity - three weeks since she discovered that her husband was sleeping with Katie Witt, a longtime White House correspondent for the Washington Post. The news was shocking, to say the least, and CJ had reacted as any woman would. Promising John a divorce, CJ had seemed confident in the choice to leave her husband.  
  
Donna admired CJ's strength, yet having secretly wondered if the Presidency could handle a public controversy as large as a divorce. It had never happened before; it would surely drag on for months in a public arena, torturing everyone and everything involved, including important national and international politics lying in the balance. Donna was not surprised when CJ had quietly decided to try and work things out with John Hoynes.  
  
'Work it out'. Donna had to scoff. Things were in knots, a desperate mess that Donna could never imagine being fixed. In the days that had followed CJ's decision to stay with the President, Donna's intuition had been proven correct. CJ and John were either arguing or not speaking at all, but it was positively clear to Donna that not a dent had been made into the pile of problems lying at their feet.  
  
The topic was off-limits with CJ as far as the staff was concerned, and though Donna was the First Lady's best friend, not even she dared to question CJ about the status of her marriage. Toby had been equally unable to get any information out of the First Lady, and everyone was simply biding their time until things returned to some semblance of normal. Donna felt that they would be waiting for quite some time.  
  
~*~  
  
Riley Hoynes walked quietly into the White House residence, a backpack slung over his shoulders. As his little sister Addison put her things in her room, Riley went across the hall to his own quarters, dumping the backpack in a corner. It would not be touched again until tomorrow morning when it was time to leave for school. First grade homework was of little challenge to the six-year-old; he almost always completed the assignment before his teacher was done explaining it. School was a boring interlude in the child's day.  
  
The dark-haired, round-faced boy, a perfect mixture of his parents, stood silently in the middle of his bedroom, contemplating what to do next. His sister had a piano lesson and it was too cold to play outside. Television was for after dinner, and Riley didn't really want to read any of his books. Just as the boy was about to accept his boredom, he heard their familiar voices.  
  
His mother and his father. They were arguing again. It was becoming a frequent occurrence; ever since his mother had thrown the crystal vase against the wall, things had been disturbed, strangely different in the Hoynes household. Riley crept to the door and stood in the threshold, within perfect earshot but out of his parent's sight. He put a finger to his lips, warning Addy to stay quiet as she appeared in her own doorway.  
  
"I don't know, John, why on earth *would* she want to stir up trouble?" CJ sneered, her voice full of angry sarcasm. "I can't think of a single reason why!"  
  
John snorted angrily back, "Jesus, CJ, I thought you said she was turning in her press pass!"  
  
"Well, fuck me, John, I'm not in charge of the press office anymore! She *told* me she was going to turn it in, but why should I trust her? Come to think of it, why should I trust you!? You're the one who couldn't keep it in his pants!"  
  
"Would you please just stop it!?" John bellowed back in response. "You tell me you want to work on this, and then you give me exactly no chances to make it better! You just attack me! How the *hell* are we supposed to put our marriage back together if you won't try!? We can't fix our problems like this, Claudia."  
  
"Oh, good God! Stop shoving bullshit in my face, John. You're the only one in this marriage who has a problem!"  
  
Riley's eyes widened and his heart sank as it always did during his parent's many recent shouting matches. He was bright enough to understand that his father had done something to upset his mother, something very bad. Riley was sharp enough to see that the stability of his family was in great jeopardy. Their yelling and fighting never ended well.  
  
"Adds, go back in your room," Riley whispered loudly, shooing his four-year-old sister out of the hall. Her eyes were full of confusion. "It's not our business," Riley hissed forcefully, pointing his sister towards her room.  
  
Addy frowned and slammed the door upon her retreat, instantly halting the voluminous screaming coming from the living room. CJ soon appeared in the hallway, her eyes bright with tears. She closed her eyes and quickly composed herself for her son's benefit, kneeling before him with forced calm. "Riley? What are you doing, kiddo?"  
  
"Sorry, Mom," he muttered, turning red as he stared at his shoes.  
  
CJ shook her head vehemently. She took one look at her soon and felt grief mix in her veins; he understood the situation all too well. "No, no, baby, there's nothing to be sorry for," she murmured, brushing a kiss on the boy's forehead. "I'm the one who's sorry."  
  
Riley fell into his mother's embrace as she pulled him close. As he tightened his arms around CJ's shoulders, Riley swallowed the lump in his throat. "Mom, what happened?" he whispered, turning his head so that he could see the living room. His father was standing alone, watching his wife and son.  
  
John caught his son's eye and instantly looked away, moving himself out of boy's sight. Frustration and anger rushed through the President and he gripped his fists together, unable to let his anxiety out in any other way. Riley was obviously aware of the trouble, John knew, and it was only adding to his inner turmoil. Addy was younger, more naïve to the happenings in the house, though John was also worried about her. He wanted nothing more than to snap his fingers and have CJ understand everything inside of him. He wanted her to forgive him and forget it; he wanted to go back to the time when his son didn't have such a questioning expression on his young face.  
  
Taking a deep breath, John paced the spacious living room. Stopping by the window, he closed his eyes and breathed again. He and CJ were going to have to sit down together and give up the screaming and high tempers. John knew it was going to be a big step for CJ to calm down and listen; it was going to be as equally hard on John - he was not feeling patient, though he no longer had the right to demand anything of his wife.  
  
A door in the hallway closed with a click, and soon after, CJ appeared in the living room. John turned around slowly.  
  
"We have to tell him, he already knows something's wrong."  
  
CJ clenched her teeth. "I don't think he needs the details, John, he's six."  
  
"We're going to have to give him more of an explanation than that!" John waved his hand blindly through the air. Unchecked frustration and anger at his own mistakes was causing John's irritability, and it wasn't easily controlled.  
  
CJ shook her head and looked down at the floor. She was feeling empty and alone, completely on her own. She wasn't getting any emotion out of John except for his extreme temper. Deep down, she didn't really believe he wanted to work anything out. She looked up and met her husband's eyes through the teary blur in her own pair. "John, what do you want from me right now? I can't - I don't - I have no idea how to...." CJ trailed off, her voice catching in her throat. She twisted her hands together and turned away from him, not ready to let John see her tears.  
  
John swallowed the lump in his throat. He took a step closer to CJ and dropped his tone. "What I want right now is nothing more than for you and I to talk, to listen to each other - CJ, I want you to tell me how I can fix what I broke. I want you to trust me again. I want-" John stopped when CJ turned around, her blue eyes big.  
  
"It's not going to be that easy!" she cried, her face crumpling with emotion. "John, I'm so ready to just leave and never come back. I don't *know* if I can do any of those things. I don't think I know how!"  
  
John nodded, keeping quiet. He was already in the deepest hole of his life - it probably couldn't get much worse, though the thought of physically losing CJ was sickening. At least she was still staying in the house with him.  
  
"CJ, that's okay. I don't care how long it takes for this to get better. I deserve every second of your punishment, and I'll wait for you," John promised, carefully watching his wife's face.  
  
CJ nodded sadly. "It's not only my punishment, John. I don't think Katie has it in her to keep quiet. The whole world is going to know about this."  
  
The tone in CJ's voice was full of a cold chill, and it sent pricks up John's spine. His mouth went dry and for a moment, he was speechless. CJ shook her head and glanced down the hallway. "Addy has a piano lesson."  
  
John nodded and watched her retreat from the living room. She was right, John knew. Beyond the small bubble they were living inside of at the White House, there was a hungry public waiting to devour even the slightest taste of scandal. John closed his eyes and cursed himself again. He'd made the worst kind of mistake, and soon the whole world was going to know.  
  
~*~  
  
The unmistakable sound of a piano playing filled the White House residence, and after listening for a moment, CJ slipped out into the hallway. Addy was occupied with her music teacher for the next hour, and after that, Audrey would be watching the children until evening. Not knowing or caring where John had gone, CJ made her way over to the East Wing. It was only late afternoon and Donna would still be in the office.  
  
As CJ walked into her office suite, the aides and interns jumped to their feet. CJ nodded at everyone, choosing to ignore the concern on their faces. The staff in her office had been looking at CJ that way for weeks, despite the fact that only those closest to CJ knew the details of John's infidelity. Anyone with a pulse could detect the sadness and angst in the First Lady's mood and demeanor.  
  
"Donna, it's me, can I come in?" CJ asked, quickly tapping the closed office door.  
  
"Of course!" Donna called, smiling to herself. Only CJ, after all her years of being the boss, would still ask permission to enter a closed door.  
  
CJ came in, shut the door, and sat down on Donna's sofa. Her eyes were brimmed with red, and it was clear to Donna that the First Lady's emotions were shot. The blonde got up and joined her longest friend on the couch. "Did something happen? You look exhausted and upset," Donna prompted quietly, hoping with all her heart that CJ might open up and talk about what was going on in her private life.  
  
CJ leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees as she rubbed her eyes. She took a big breath, her chest heaving as the air rushed in and out. Suddenly an idea popped into her head, and CJ turned abruptly towards Donna. "I need your car keys."  
  
Donna twisted her mouth and glanced at her purse, hanging near the door. "Why? If you need to go somewhere, Bobby will arrange for the car."  
  
CJ's eyes widened pointedly. "Exactly. I need to be alone, without the agents."  
  
Donna shook her head and gently touched CJ's wrist, where the woman's pulse was racing. "The Secret Service isn't going to let you out of their sight, CJ. What happened? Why are you so anxious to get out of here?" Donna chewed her lower lip, worry coursing through her. CJ was obviously reeling, obviously distressed. It was a rare sight.  
  
CJ suddenly stood up, her arms flailing as she paced out her frustration. "I can't take this, Donna. Me, John, the kids - it's all such a mess. I don't think I can stay inside of my own skin for another minute. I just can't take it!"  
  
Donna forced herself to remain calm for CJ's benefit, though fears were clouding the blonde's senses. CJ wasn't talking rationally, and it was extremely out of character. "Sit down, CJ," she ordered softly. "Sit down. Talk to me."  
  
Back on the couch, CJ sank into the cushions and curled her feet up under her. Staring at the cuff of her blouse, the usually put-together woman looked ready to break down. With a shaky breath, CJ tried to focus on something other than the hot tears poised to spill. "For more years than I can count, I've been living this life, Donna, and right now, all I want to do is go back to the day before he walked in and took over," CJ whispered, closing her eyes.  
  
Donna reached out and brushed from CJ's cheek the two tears that had escaped. "Shhh, don't say that. There are good things about your marriage, about this lifestyle. Despite what happened, you know how much he's always loved you. He worships you, CJ, that's why he wants to try and work it out. You have to give it time," Donna said quietly, slowly easing CJ into her embrace. "It's going to be okay if you allow it to be. Don't worry."  
  
With her head against Donna's shoulder, CJ allowed herself to cry. "I just want to get out of here, Donna," she sobbed, feeling the heat of her emotion flood out uncontrolled. "I really, really just want to go home."  
  
Donna's stomach flipped as she squeezed CJ's shoulders. The older woman seemed almost frail in Donna's embrace. "Where's home?" Donna asked cautiously - it was an odd choice of words that CJ had used.  
  
CJ grew quiet and soon pulled herself out of Donna's hug. Straightening her blouse and fighting to regain control, the First Lady briefly closed her eyes. When she opened them, she offered Donna a much calmer face and a small, forced smile. "I didn't mean - well, I don't know. I guess I just want to feel more at home in my life." CJ shook her head and dropped her voice as well as her eyes. "I'm just so afraid that it's never going to be possible again."  
  
Donna nodded, nothing to say. She really had no idea what CJ was going through; so many times in the past weeks, she'd tried to imagine what it would feel like if Josh carried out an affair with another woman. Donna didn't know what she would do, and she gave CJ credit for simply getting out of bed each morning.  
  
CJ seemed to be in another world as she silently stood up and left Donna's office. Donna wanted to get up and follow, but still at a loss for words, she could only sit and watch.  
  
~*~  
  
The next morning, after she knew that the Senior Staff meeting had ended, Carol made her way over to the West Wing. The territory still seemed familiar, and as she walked down the hall towards the Deputy Chief-of- Staff's office, Carol passed her old quarters outside of the Press Secretary's office. Smiling at the current aide, Carol shook her head in disbelief. So much time had come and gone since those days. So much had happened and so much had changed.  
  
"Kim, does he have a second?" Carol asked, leaning against the glass of the bullpen wall.  
  
Sam's assistant greeted Carol and checked her watch. "Hey, Carol. Nice to see you. He's free for the next twenty minutes, so God only knows what he's doing in there."  
  
Carol grinned and walked into Sam's office, the door wide open and inviting. "Sam! Get up!"  
  
Sam was leaned back in his chair, his eyes closed. He jolted at the sound of his name, nearly knocking himself off the chair. "Whoa," he said groggily, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes. "I guess I fell asleep."  
  
Carol sat down across from the desk and chuckled. "I guess you did. Margaret told you I was coming?"  
  
Sam took a long sip from his coffee cup, still orienting himself to the land of the living. "Yeah, she mentioned you might drop by. What's going on in the First Lady's office?" Sam's thoughts briefly flew to CJ. He and Bruce had learned of John's affair personally from the President himself, and the shock value of that news still had not worn off. "How's CJ doing?"  
  
Carol caught the change of tone in Sam's voice. She raised her brow and pointedly asked, "I'm assuming you guys found out?"  
  
Sam nodded and stroked his chin. He needed a shave. "Yeah, and I've been losing sleep ever since. This isn't the kind of thing that stays quiet in Washington, D.C."  
  
Carol tossed her long dark hair behind her shoulder and leaned forward. "That's why I'm here. Margaret and Donna want to crush these gossip column stories. Someone - probably Katie Witt - is tipping ears over at the Post. They're starting to notice that the President and First Lady aren't exactly cozy these days. It's going to get bigger, and fast."  
  
Sam took a deep breath and focused his eyes on Carol's. "The President said that they're staying together. It's not getting any better?"  
  
Carol slowly shook her head, her expression serious. "CJ looks like she could burst into tears at any given moment. And I don't think they're speaking."  
  
Sam snorted. "I'll tell you, if I didn't work for the man, I'd probably kick his ass. This is the last thing CJ deserves."  
  
Carol snorted wryly. "That's why we need to take pre-emptive measures and stop these gossipy whispers. Let's run a joint event - something they can go to together, maybe even as a family, where we can get some free media, some good artwork. Put up the image of the perfect, happy family. It's what we really need to get out there right now. It might not actually fix their marriage, but it'll get the press to back off."  
  
Sam sighed. "Do you remember when politics wasn't all about lying and manipulating the truth?"  
  
Carol waited a beat, her mouth set in a line. "No. I don't."  
  
Sam smiled sadly and let it sink in for a moment. Then he reached for a pen and paper. "I'll get Kim to make a list of upcoming events. I'll have her call you guys in the next few hours."  
  
Carol stood up and smiled, affectionately tapping the desk twice. "Thanks, Sam."  
  
Sam watched the brunette as she retreated from his office. If things were really as bad as Carol indicated, it was going to take a lot more than a joint appearance to put out the fire that John Hoynes had started.  
  
~*~  
  
The next day Margaret was wading through the day's news, looking for anything relevant to the First Lady. There had been nothing out of the ordinary until she came to the gossip column in the Washington Post. She re- read the short piece twice before cautiously setting down the paper and reaching for her telephone.  
  
"Donna, I need you," Margaret said urgently into the receiver. Before she could set the phone back in the cradle, Donna appeared at Margaret's desk, a panicked expression on her face.  
  
"What now?" Donna asked, eyeing the newsprint with distaste.  
  
Margaret swallowed and held up the paper for her boss to see. "Someone is asking the right questions of the right people, if you know what I mean."  
  
Donna's eyes ran from line to line of the short gossip piece. Without emotion, she put the paper back down on Margaret's desk. "I'm going to call CJ. I need you to talk to Danny Concannon. We might be able to find out if he knows anything about this. Arrange a meeting if you have to."  
  
Margaret nodded and worriedly watched Donna go back into her office. The door slammed behind the blonde with a nervous intensity; there were so many questions that Margaret knew they'd all be asking of Danny. As she lifted the phone to dial the reporter's number, Margaret wondered if they really wanted to know the answers.  
  
~*~  
  
"Danny, all we're really trying to say," Donna tried, pausing for a deep breath, "is that you were the only one who noticed the President's activities in Russia."  
  
"That might not be true, Donna - I'm just the only one who told you. Really you can't accuse me of feeding this story to Stu Winkle. I'll tell you right now that I didn't," Danny snorted incredulously. He wasn't offended by the questioning, far from it. Mostly he was just amused, but concern for the First Lady tinted his thoughts. He looked over at Donna's sofa, where CJ was quietly poised. Her legs were crossed and so were her hands, her eyes downcast, her expression full of barely contained emotion. She looked small.  
  
Donna sighed heavily. "Danny, I'm just trying to find out *how* Stu Winkle would know to write something like this. He has an unnamed source in today's column saying that the President has conducted an extramarital affair. He indicated that it was still taking place during the Russia trip, and he somehow knows that the 'other woman' is a blonde journalist. It's not a shot in the dark."  
  
"More people know about this than you think," Danny said pointedly to Donna. He turned his entire body in order to face CJ. "Look, I know you must be going through hell as it is without the whole world getting into your business. I'm not lying to you. I'm not Stu Winkle's source."  
  
CJ didn't look at the reporter. "I believe you, Danny," she said quietly. "Do you have any idea who might be talking?"  
  
Danny was caught off guard by the waver in CJ's voice. He cleared his throat and took on a gentle tone. "It could be anyone. For all we know, it could be Katie herself. The thing you need to remember is that it doesn't really matter who the leak is - this is the type of story you can control by what you say and do in the press - forget the source."  
  
Donna closed her eyes and massaged her temples. A headache was burning in her mind and her pregnancy - among other things - was making her feel sick. "Well, I'd still like to find and kill whoever is stirring up trouble. This should be a completely private matter!" Donna looked up and met the reporter's eyes. "If she were any other married woman, it would be no one's business."  
  
Danny held Donna's gaze. "When you're married to the President of the United States, it's everybody's business. She's been in the game long enough to know that, Donna. And just ask your husband; Josh will tell you the same thing."  
  
CJ stood up, weary of being talked about as though she were invisible. "Thanks, Danny. If you hear anything, please let me know?"  
  
Danny stood up and reached for CJ's hand, giving it a brief squeeze. He wasn't supposed to be doing favors for these people, he was supposed to be finding the story and writing it. But with CJ, it had always been different. "I'll call you, not my editor."  
  
"I appreciate that," CJ smiled faintly and returned the squeeze to the reporter's hand. "Thank you."  
  
After Danny was gone from the office, Donna glanced over at the First Lady. "So that was a complete waste of our time."  
  
CJ snorted and crossed her arms over the front of her tailored black suit-jacket. She turned towards her Chief-of-Staff. "No, he pointed out something very valid. Forget the source, Donna, and let's do a big photo op. Lots of press, happy kids, happy couple. I'll suck it up."  
  
Donna nodded, making a mental note. "Grin and bear it?"  
  
"Grin and bear it," CJ muttered, turning to leave.  
  
Just as CJ was about to exit the office, Donna cleared her throat. "CJ, you know, you told the President that you wanted to work this out."  
  
CJ raised her brow, faint irritation crossing her expression. "Yeah?"  
  
Donna swallowed. She'd noticed this a few days ago, and simply had to ask. "Then why have you taken off your wedding rings?"  
  
CJ glanced down at the floor before glancing back at Donna. She shook her head. "I'll see you later."  
  
~*~  
  
"Good morning, Mr. President," Sam said, nodding his head formally as he walked into the Oval Office behind the Chief-of-Staff.  
  
Hoynes leaned back in his chair, making no move to get up as both Sam and Bruce took up space in front of the desk. "What's going on?"  
  
Bruce glanced at Sam. "You're scheduled today to speak at the NEA rally in Philadelphia."  
  
The President looked blankly at his aides. He was tired and working on cranky. "Yes, I know. Sam gave me the final draft yesterday. Pretty routine stuff - why do you both have that same scheming look on your faces?"  
  
Sam spoke up. "No look on my face, Sir. We've been trying to coordinate with the First Lady's office an opportunity for some public face- time with the two of you together. Take her to the speech with you today. There will be lots of press there, and we can get photographs out there of you two getting on and off of the helicopter."  
  
John raised a brow. "You're not worried about questions the press might ask?"  
  
Bruce smirked, proposing an answer for John to give. "A, it's a gossip column making allegations and B, you and your wife have never been happier. That's where you put your arm around her waist and smile."  
  
John nodded slowly, pursing his lips. His Presidential façade was quickly melting away. "You know, my wife and I are hardly speaking to one another. If we're saying anything at all, it's in the spirit of hurting each other's feelings. I don't know how she'll feel about putting on a charade."  
  
Sam glanced at Bruce before carefully choosing his words. "Mr. President, I know this isn't an easy time for both of you, and despite CJ's private feelings on the matter, she's very much aware that this could turn into a public disaster. She's willing to "put on a charade" as you said, I believe, in the hopes that it will lead you both back to where you want to be."  
  
John sat up and straightened his tie, entirely uncomfortable discussing his marriage with his staff while in the Oval Office. "Well, let's arrange for an early departure, then. I can take some questions from the press and hold her hand," the President muttered, waving his hand through the air, dismissing the issue. "What's next?"  
  
~*~  
  
CJ felt stiff as she straightened her freshly pressed ivory suit. She felt false and cheap with her perfectly made-up face, on which her staff had spent some extra time. No amount of make-up or expensive clothing was going to make her feel any better, despite Donna's insistence that a manicure could do the trick.  
  
John was just as rigid, CJ could tell, with her hand effectively locked in the crook of his elbow. They were forced into playing this game of dress-up for the press, and though CJ felt entirely unnatural at her husband's side, she hoped that the press would take their photographs and believe the lie.  
  
As they walked outside to the South Lawn, CJ involuntarily tightened her grip on John's arm. Legitimate media was quickly picking up on the gossip column tones, and it wasn't going to be long before real journalists started asking questions. This morning, they were waiting down on the lawn in a large drove, waiting to dig in and discover.  
  
"You okay?" John whispered, concern in his voice as he dropped his arm to lead CJ down the stairs, On the fresh, green lawn Marine One was waiting and ready to go. They only had to get past the long rope line of press.  
  
CJ kept her eyes straight ahead. She smiled through gritted teeth, acutely aware of the flashing cameras. They found their footing on the lawn and began to walk Glancing back at the White House, CJ felt her heart flip. God, she'd been involved in politics for far too long. "Aside from the fact that we have to do this? I'm fine, thanks."  
  
"Is it really so awful to have stand next to me?" John grunted, waving cordially at the gathered crowd, while at the same time curling CJ's arm gently back under his. To those watching, it was an affectionate gesture. "I'm trying so hard, CJ, but you really need to give me a little more to work with, here."  
  
"I'm giving you all I've got, John, believe me." CJ cocked her head towards John, a perfect smile in place on her face. All outwards appearances would indicate complete bliss between the couple. After all their years in the spotlight, the two were excellent actors.  
  
Hoynes didn't have the opportunity to respond, for they had reached the press line. As scripted, John stopped to grant the reporters a few moments of on-the-record time. CJ stood dutifully beside her husband, fighting nausea as she remembered that they were likely being carried live on CNN or CSPAN.  
  
The questions were bland and routine, helped along by John's most cheerful demeanor. CJ was just about positive that they would get on the helicopter unscathed, without having to answer a single personal question. It was wishful thinking.  
  
"Mr. President, are you and Mrs. Hoynes aware of the allegations printed in yesterday's Post regarding an extramarital affair?"  
  
CJ didn't see who asked the question, but she was eerily aware of the sharp silence that had fallen over the gathered reporters. John casually slipped his arm around CJ waist and trotted out the smoothest of answers. "I believe the story you're referring to was in the gossip column, which is something we never pay attention to."  
  
"Can you tell us if what was printed is true?"  
  
CJ felt her heart flip; it was a miracle that she was still standing on her own two feet. Involuntarily leaning against John for support, she turned to him and smiled shakily as he offered her a quick, seemingly- smooth wink. There was no way to answer that question without lying, not if they wanted everyone to back off. John turned back to the press, a benevolent smile in place. "I'm not going to dignify rumors about our marriage with a response. All I can tell you is that I love this woman more than anything in the world. We have a very happy family."  
  
And then John was leading CJ away from the press towards the waiting helicopter. CJ longed to feel it lift her off of the ground and take them away; as she clung to her husband, the reporter's clamor rose above the chop of the blades. They were calling her name.  
  
The door shut firmly behind CJ and the President; they sat down across from one another and took a deep breath. For one of the only times in her life, she found herself shaken up by the press. CJ fought to regain control, noticing her hands still clasped within John's. He was studying her urgently, his eyes soft and dark. "Claudia, Sweetheart."  
  
CJ felt her eyes well with tears; when he said her name in that sweet, gentle way, CJ never failed to melt inside. She eased her fingers out of John's, shyly glancing up at him and then away. "That was a good answer," she said nervously, feeling flushed as she realized that John could still get to her in that way. The helicopter was lifting off of the ground, hovering over Washington D.C.  
  
John leaned closer to his wife, bringing his mouth just inches from CJ's ear so she could hear him above the noise of the chopper. "I meant it."  
  
CJ nodded, shivering at the feel of her husband's breath against her ear. Self-consciously, she sighed and leaned back, settling into the seat. She took a deep breath and kept her eyes from John, focusing instead on the ground below.  
  
~*~  
  
A week had passed since the Philadelphia appearance, and in that week, the press had not backed off or lost interest in the possibility of Hoynes' affair. As Donna arrived at the Georgetown townhouse that she shared with Josh, the blonde realized that the media wasn't going to give up until they found the truth. The day's New York Times had carried a story regarding a cover-up of news that there was life found on Mars. The scientific report had been classified and kept quiet, but the fact had been leaked. It was being attributed back to John Hoynes himself, a quote obtained at a less-than-appropriate time. Donna knew that Katie Witt was the source.  
  
As she dragged herself up the townhouse stairs, the streetlights blinked behind her. It was nearly eleven o'clock at night, the days growing longer with Donna's pregnancy. The added stress of CJ and John's predicament was helping nothing. She opened the door and entered the townhouse, pleased to see her husband leaning against the wall.  
  
"I heard you pull up," he grinned, immediately taking her overcoat and briefcase. "You've got to ask CJ to cut your hours."  
  
Donna smiled and fell into Josh's embrace. Leaning her head against his shoulder and feeling his arms encircle her back, Donna thought she might just fall asleep on her feet. "I can cut my hours anytime I feel like it," she murmured. "But CJ needs me now."  
  
Josh understood the sentiment all too well. He began to move, leading Donna into the kitchen. "Sit down. I'll heat up some soup for you. Do you want a sandwich? A salad?"  
  
Donna waved her hand through the air as she found the kitchen table. Settling in a chair, she slid her hands over her stomach. She was nearly six months pregnant. "Do we have any pickles?"  
  
Josh scrunched his nose up but said nothing as he looked through the refrigerator. "So, tell me about your day."  
  
Donna sighed. "More of the same. We can't control this story, and CJ's going crazy. You know I think it's no one's business whether or not he had an affair."  
  
Josh brought a large jar of pickles over to the table with a plate. He set the items down in front of his wife before taking a seat beside her. "I still don't believe it."  
  
"Well, it's true," Donna mumbled through a mouthful of pickle. "In the past week, they've done two appearances together, playing nice and holding hands. Both times, the press has gotten the President to comment on the rumors in some way or another. The sound bites aren't good and it's only fueling the fire."  
  
Josh fished a pickle out of the jar and looked at his wife. "I saw the Times today. It has to be bullshit - do you honestly think that man is stupid enough to tell secrets from a classified report?"  
  
Donna stopped eating and focused her eyes on Josh's. She shrugged and said nothing. Josh shook his head incredulously. "Wow. I guess I'm giving him too much credit, then. Why is CJ even bothering to stay?"  
  
Donna looked pointedly at Josh. "It's not for me to say. Just take this as a lesson, Mr. Lyman."  
  
Josh's jaw dropped, slightly humored. "Don't worry, Donna, you and Josh Jr. will always have me all to yourselves."  
  
Donna grinned, chewing on her pickle. She patted her belly and eyed her husband. "We are not naming the baby Josh."  
  
"Well, not if it's a girl, of course not," Josh chuckled, covering Donna's hand with his. They exchanged smiles and Josh sighed. "Hey, Donna, don't worry about this stuff with CJ and the President. It'll blow over."  
  
Donna nodded and watched Josh get up. She wanted to believe him, but something told her that nothing was going to blow over anytime soon.  
  
~*~  
  
CJ took a deep breath and crossed her arms over her chest as she watched Ron Butterfield enter the Oval Office. It was never pleasant news when the head of the President's security detail had that look on his face.  
  
John Hoynes glanced over at his wife before greeting the seasoned agent. "Good morning, Ron."  
  
"Mr. President." He nodded before noticing CJ standing off to the side. Her expression was tight and Ron thought the First Lady looked anxious. "Good morning, Mrs. Hoynes. It's nice to see you."  
  
CJ smiled faintly. "What's going on?"  
  
John gestured at the empty sofas and they all sat, with CJ choosing a cushion that put distance between her and her husband. Ron held a thin manila folder on his lap but did not open it as he began to speak. "I'm here to inform you that we'll be tightening your security detail for today's event in New York. We've been getting a number of unusually credible threats specific to you, Mr. President. Since you'll be appearing together at the rally, we're not going take a chance with Mrs. Hoynes' protection, either."  
  
John glanced at CJ, whose eyes had gone wide. Ever since her brush with a stalker ten years earlier, she did not deal well with security threats. The President cleared his throat. "Tell me about the threats."  
  
Ron's expression was blank. "Death threats, very detailed, very clear. They're coming from the same two sources, and we've got agents following all leads. I believe the threats are being fueled by the current information coming out in the press."  
  
CJ lowered her eyes, appreciative that Ron could sidestep an embarrassing topic so smoothly. People were threatening to kill John because of the fact that he may have had an affair. Probably the Christian right. CJ took a deep breath. "What's going to happen today?"  
  
Ron nodded. "I'm adding four extra agents to each of your protection details while you'll be out in the open air at the event. The venue in the city is being tightened up as we speak, and I really wouldn't worry about this, too much. It's just procedure that I give you the information."  
  
The President stood up, concerned but determined to hide it. "Thank you, Ron."  
  
"Thank you, Mr. President, Mrs. Hoynes."  
  
John waited until the agent had left the Oval Office before turning to his wife. He softened his expression with concern for her. "Do you still want to go with me today? You certainly don't have to, if you don't want to."  
  
CJ shook her head. She knew it was important to appear with John, for both the sake of the media and their marriage. "I'll be there."  
  
John nodded, wanting to say more, wanting to continue the conversation. Slowly but surely, each day, John could see CJ opening up, bit by bit. He anticipated that it wouldn't be long before they could really start to fix their marriage.  
  
He took a deep breath and sighed. Patience wasn't his strong suit. But for now he was just going to have to give her time, especially since he'd missed another opportunity. CJ had already walked out of the Oval Office and onto the portico, shutting the door tightly behind her.  
  
~*~  
  
It was seven-fifteen in the morning. Riley Hoynes climbed into the black limo, holding out an impatient hand for his little sister, Addison. She was nearly two years younger and much shorter than he was; even with help, she always had trouble getting into the car.  
  
"Thanks," the little girl breathed, settling back against the plush leather. After straightening her school's blue uniform jumper, she glanced over at Riley and noticed it again. "That's the fourth time. Why do you keep looking at your watch?"  
  
The door had been slammed shut, the tinted windows blocking out the late winter sun. Riley felt the car begin to roll as he looked at his sister's small, curious face. "I'm trying to remember what time Mom said they'd be back from New York."  
  
Addy hugged her small pink backpack and shrugged. "Hmmm, I don't know. Not until after school, though."  
  
"After school, perfect," the six-year-old murmured, going over his plan once again.  
  
Addy narrowed her eyes. "What are you up to?"  
  
The boy shook his head. "Don't worry about it."  
  
Addy turned her entire body towards her brother, insistent. "You better believe I will. What are you up to?" she asked again, her small voice loud enough to make Riley jump. She may not have yet reached five, but Addy was intuitive. The way things had been at home, lately, she never knew what to expect.  
  
Riley took a deep breath and tugged at the blue tie he was forced to wear to school. It was so uncomfortable. "I think I know how to make Mom and Dad stop fighting. I just have to take things into my own hands."  
  
Addy looked skeptical. The car was turning a corner; they were almost at the school. "I don't want Mommy yelling at me the way she yells at Dad. I don't want to get in trouble, so you can just count me out."  
  
"I never counted you in, dimwit. Just don't freak out when I don't show up after school," the boy muttered, patting one of the pockets in his pants. The money was still there, safe and sound.  
  
Addy's expression fell slack. "Where are you going to be instead?"  
  
"You don't know a thing," Riley said, pointing a sly finger at his little sister. "And that's how I want it."  
  
Addy sat back, confused, slightly nervous, and annoyed. She didn't have a good feeling about this, especially since her brother was too smart for his own good. The car stopped suddenly, right in front of the children's school and before Addy could say another word to Riley, he hopped out. Slowly Addy slid out of the limo and began to walk into the imposingly large building, reaching for the hand of her favorite agent. Riley might be all right on his own, but she was sticking close to home.  
  
~*~  
  
It was an education speech, a very routine one at that, but the mayor was on hand and so was the press. John Hoynes didn't care what the event was - he and CJ were going to be at them all, looking together and happy. He figured that eventually, if they kept pretending, they might actually *become* together and happy. And then their troubles would be over. For now, John knew, he was teetering on thin ice.  
  
The backstage area was a bustle of activity as the start time of the event grew closer. Outside in the sunny city morning, the crowd gathered in the park was murmuring, waiting for the President and his wife. Turning around, John saw CJ walking with Donna. Donna was looking more and more pregnant each day, and John smiled at the memory of when CJ that way. His smile faded when reality hit him, yet again. He was so close to losing her and everything else in their life. So close. He was supposed to be waiting, supposed to be on CJ's timetable - but the awful urge to reconnect with his wife was constantly with him. He had to start taking action.  
  
"CJ," John called, cocking his head. He gave her a genuine smile. "C'mere."  
  
CJ glanced nervously at Donna before leaving her Chief-of-Staff. She moved quickly and stood next to John, self-consciously straightening her blue suit. "Donna says we only have five minutes."  
  
John nodded, reaching out to take CJ's hand away from the hem of her jacket. She was startled by the action, not quick enough to pull away from his touch. Their eyes met and John dropped his voice. "Don't worry about your clothes, you look absolutely stunning. You always do."  
  
CJ lowered her eyes and brushed her shoulder-length hair away from her face. "Thank you," she murmured, very much aware of the warmth coming from John's fingers.  
  
John knew his compliments were getting him nowhere, but he would not stop giving them to her. Now, he was also going to give her an idea. "This weekend," he began, leaning closer to his wife, their hands still connected, "what do you say we pack a few bags and run down to the Outer Banks? Bruce has always offered to let us use his place, and we've never taken him up on it."  
  
CJ raised her eyes to look at John. They were inches apart, the scene likely looking very intimate. It bothered CJ only mildly. "What about the kids?"  
  
"They can come, too," John smiled, squeezing CJ's hand. He hoped that she could see confidence in him, despite that fact that he was scared silly. "What do you say? We'll talk, relax, get comfortable again."  
  
CJ took a deep breath. She *had* agreed to try with John. And the beach sounded like a nice place to start doing just that. She slid her free arm around John's middle and embraced him, her answer unspoken. John tightened his hold on her, placed a kiss on top of CJ's head, and closed his eyes briefly with silent thanks. Now, they were getting somewhere.  
  
~*~  
  
Riley Hoynes watched the second hand tick by on the clock above the blackboard. He was anxious to put his plan into action - but he had to wait another three minutes. He tapped his pencil impatiently against his desk and went over it again. At exactly five minutes after eleven, he would ask to use the bathroom. When the class was dismissed ten minutes later for recess, no one would notice that he hadn't yet returned - the teacher would simply assume he'd gone off to recess, then to lunch like a good, responsible student. And by the time class started again, Riley knew he'd be long gone. His Secret Service Agent, however, wouldn't be so easy to fool. He was only going to have a few minutes before Tanner was hunting him down.  
  
"Yes, Riley?" the teacher smiled, noticing the boy's raised hand.  
  
"May I use the bathroom, please?" Riley asked politely, standing up with a smile.  
  
The teacher nodded and gave him a hall pass before continuing on with the first grade spelling lesson. Riley didn't feel guilty about leaving school; one day during class, he had completed the entire spelling book. School, the child figured as he walked, was a total waste of his time. Passing by the cubby holes, Riley smoothly grabbed his backpack before ducking into the hall.  
  
"Hey, Tanner," Riley greeted his agent, who had been alertly standing with his back against the wall. "What's up?"  
  
"Bean Stalk is moving," he murmured into his sleeve as he began to follow the tall six-year old. "Where you headed, kiddo?"  
  
Riley grinned up at the young agent, one of his favorites. "Just going to the bathroom."  
  
"With your backpack?" Tanner asked, raising a humored brow.  
  
Riley smirked. "Well, maybe on the way back, I'm going to the vending machine and buying a soda to have with lunch. You know how my mom never lets me have the stuff." He turned around as they reached the door marked Boy's Room. "Be right out."  
  
Tanner nodded. It was Secret Service practice to wait outside of a restroom, and the agent thought nothing of Riley's soda craving. He stood against the wall and waited.  
  
Inside of the restroom, Riley checked each stall, pleased to find it empty. He looked around and took a deep breath before slipping on his backpack. The window ledge would have been too high for most, but with his tall stature, Riley had no trouble hopping onto it. Easily, he hoisted open the window, and in no time flat, he was off and running.  
  
~*~  
  
CJ felt strangely warm inside as she watched her husband speak about the necessity of better public education. The hug they had shared backstage had been the first ounce of physical contact the couple had made in weeks; CJ felt energized by it and slowly her fear of reconciliation was melting away. A weekend at the beach would be lovely, and though she was not even close to forgetting about what John had done, CJ thought she might be able to forgive him sometime soon.  
  
As she sat on the dais next to the podium and pretended to look interested, CJ began to consider what she might pack for the weekend. It would be too cool to swim in the ocean, CJ thought, but Bruce's place had an indoor Jacuzzi. A bathing suit, some towels and comfortable loungewear, pajamas, and the children would need -  
  
CJ's wandering thoughts were cut off by short, loud, punctuated bursts of gunfire as they exploded into the morning air. Screams erupted and suddenly someone heavy was on top of her body, knocking her from the chair and onto the stage floor. CJ couldn't see a thing, but she could hear the panicked, horrified scuffle of the running crowd. There was more gunfire, and the agent covering her body was using his hands to protect her head. CJ was terrified as she lifted her eyes in an effort to try and find John. CJ's heart dropped when all she saw were bloody marks, brushed brightly across the stage floor.  
  
~*~  
  
Carol barged through the door to Margaret's office, the wood smacking loudly against the wall. "Get the TV on, you're not going to believe what just happened!"  
  
Margaret was startled by the horror on Carol's expression; she lunged across the desk for the remote and flicked the set on while Carol huddled beside her. CNN news had been running the President's event live, and now pandemonium had broken loose. The bar at the bottom of the screen indicated that gunshots had been fired. The noise at the scene was deafening. Margaret's eyes widened with fear. "Oh my God."  
  
Carol swallowed hard and wiped away tears. It was déjà vu. "I don't know what to do! I'm not sure if everyone's okay - look, watch as they replay it," Carol shakily said, pointing at the screen as it re-ran video of the exact moment the guns were fired. The scene had been normal and calm, the President at the podium and CJ sitting visibly off to the side. Then the shots were fired and the President was immediately down, clearly tackled by three agents. CJ, too, had been pushed to the ground in a breathtakingly fast swoop; it was almost hard to tell if it was the work of an agent or a bullet.  
  
Margaret could hardly breathe. "Donna's there, too, somewhere. Christ, somebody had better call Josh; he's going to be-"  
  
Carol choked on a sob and shook her head as the phones in the office began to cling and clamor. At the same moment, Margaret's door bounced open again, revealing a crew of Secret Service Agents dressed in black. The phones continued to ring as the agents entered, their stoic faces only adding to the nervous fear.  
  
~*~  
  
She had badly scraped her legs when the agent had taken her down; CJ felt her cuts sting as five men encircled her, rushing her towards the waiting motorcade. She stumbled blindly, somehow reaching down to touch her stocking-covered knee. She came up with blood on her fingers, but at least she was alive.  
  
All around her, people were screaming and running; the scene was an awful recreation of Rosslyn, with more people, more gunfire, and more fear. CJ's terror was welling to a fever pitch in the pit of her stomach as she was shoved into the car; she landed roughly against the leather seat and instantly the door slammed behind her. They rolled away with tires screeching.  
  
Catching her ragged breath, CJ pushed her loose hair out of her eyes and looked up, insanely relieved to see her husband collapsed against the seat. He appeared unharmed, though bright slashes of blood were painted across his white oxford. With her entire being full of emotion, CJ crawled over the seat and buried herself against his body.  
  
John swallowed hard, in disbelief. He had a dead agent's blood all over his clothing, and CJ was clinging to him in a silent plea to fix this day-gone-wrong. He sank his fingers into her hair and tried to quiet her sobbing. "Shh, don't cry, Darling, don't cry. We're okay; we're okay, CJ."  
  
CJ choked on her tears and lifted her head, her grip on John's middle deathly tight. "Where's Donna? Did you see Donna?"  
  
John shook his head quickly, methodically stroking CJ's shoulders. Her voice had come out in gasps, and if she didn't calm down, she was going to hyperventilate. "The only thing I saw was the ground coming up as they pushed me down." John lifted CJ up into a sitting position, carefully examining her for wounds. He gently touched her bleeding forehead. "Oh, Sweetheart," he cringed. "That looks awful - does it hurt?"  
  
CJ felt sick and dizzy; she hadn't even felt the gash on her head. "My knees," she whispered, touching them briefly and finding her hand covered in sticky, red blood. "Oh, God," she murmured through her nausea, leaning back against John in exhaustion and fear. "Oh my God, what's going to happen now?"  
  
John closed his eyes and held tight to his wife. His head was pounding and he had no idea what was coming next.  
  
~*~  
  
Carol and Margaret were full of tension as they sat out in the main office lobby with the rest of CJ's staff. The four agents had arrived nearly thirty minutes ago to guard the office as the White House proceeded with a standard lockdown. Currently, everyone was riveted to the television sets as the news was relayed over and over again. Gunshots, gunshots, gunshots - the shooter and an agent dead - no other known casualties - the President and First Lady were safe.  
  
Margaret was dying to get in touch with Donna, but the expectant mother's cell phone just kept ringing and ringing. If she didn't pick up the phone soon, Margaret knew that the blood pressure of the entire staff was going to shoot through the roof.  
  
Carol saw it first, her face paling as she clapped a hand over her mouth. Margaret noticed the brunette's ashen expression, and instantly followed Carol's line of sight over to the nearest television.  
  
"We have some breaking news that's going to add to the mounting tension of what has already been a frightening morning for Americans. Riley Hoynes, the six year old son of President and Mrs. Hoynes, has been reported as missing by the Secret Service and District of Columbia police. Details regarding the boy's disappearances from his school are sketchy at this time, though authorities are not ruling out a kidnapping. It has not yet been determined if the child's disappearance is related to this morning's assassination attempt on the President.."  
  
~*~  
  
They were in a small room in a large building; CJ had not recognized what part of the city they were in, though she had tried to look around when she and John had been hustled out of the motorcade. This was a 'safe house', as Ron had called it. They couldn't yet board Air Force One, for it was currently undergoing an emergency inspection. After the shooting, there was no taking chances.  
  
A doctor had been brought into the room shortly after CJ and John arrived; he examined the President for any injuries and declared him in perfect condition. John had smirked at that - he felt just about as far from perfect as he'd ever been. After the doctor was through with her, CJ's knees were bandaged in white, as was the gash on her forehead. She was pale, more shaken up than anything. The doctor was just leaving the room when Ron Butterfield entered, his expression grim and serious. Things were about to get worse for the couple.  
  
"Mr. President," Ron began gingerly, "your son is missing from the school in Washington." Ron did not give John and CJ a chance to process the information; he barged ahead. "He was excused from class with a hall pass, and his agent followed him to the bathroom. Riley went inside, and after he did not reappear within a few minutes, the agent entered the restroom. The window was up, the screen pushed out."  
  
CJ looked ready to explode, and as John held tightly to her hand, he was not sure he understood what Ron Butterfield was saying. This news, combined with the stress of having been shot at, sent the President's temper flaring. He began to snap at Ron. "You're trying to tell me that my son just *disappeared* from a bathroom at school? He's six years old! He's a child! My God! This is ridiculous! If you guys can't keep track of *him*, I'm not sure how we're still alive right now!!"  
  
CJ put her free hand soothingly on John's shoulder, squeezing it in an effort to calm him down. "Riley can be tricky, John," she murmured, glancing up at John with fresh tears in her eyes. She couldn't believe that her baby was missing; instantly CJ's horrified thoughts fled to her other child. "Oh my God, Addy! Is Addy okay? Do you have her?" she exclaimed, panic rushing though her.  
  
Ron nodded firmly. "Yes, Ma'am. Your daughter is currently being transported back to the White House. As soon as she arrives, the building will be in a state of lockdown."  
  
"You think my son was kidnapped?" John gruffly asked. He was masking his fear with anger.  
  
Ron's expression was stone solid. "We're not ruling anything out at the moment. Like I said, the window in the bathroom was up, the screen pushed out. It was unlocked from the inside, so we're not excluding the possibility that your son climbed out on his own."  
  
John was offended at the thought. "There is NO way he climbed out on his own; Riley is well-behaved and wouldn't do something like that," the President sneered, feeling vicious and unchecked. He wanted Riley back home safe, and he wanted it to happen now. "Ron, if you don't find my son, so help me, God.."  
  
A tearful CJ cut her husband off. "Please, Ron, please, you have got to get him back."  
  
Ron felt his heart flip; parents of missing children were what he hated dealing with most. "The District was completely shut down within the five minutes after Riley was reported missing - he could not have gotten far. We've got every agent out tracking him down, and the media is running this story as we speak. I have a very good feeling that your son is going to be back in our hands in no time at all."  
  
CJ didn't look convinced. "You'll update us every half-hour?"  
  
John shook his head, his voice commanding. "Every fifteen minutes."  
  
Ron nodded sharply and turned, leaving the First Couple alone in the small room. CJ took a deep, ragged breath and looked around. There was a couch and a small table, the white walls stark in the windowless room. She tugged on John's hand. "Sit with me; I don't think I can stand up for another minute."  
  
John followed his wife and they collapsed together onto the sofa, exhausted. Curling CJ into his arms, he held her close and sighed as she settled her head against his shoulder. They'd been shot at, flung into the car, and taken to this room, only to be told that their son was missing from school. The affair and CJ's silent treatment seemed light years in the past. John squeezed his wife's body tightly against his and kissed her hair. "Everything will be fine," he murmured, not quite believing the words as he said them. "Everything will be fine."  
  
CJ moaned, caught up in her headache. The doctor had given her a dose of an extra-strength painkiller, but it had not yet kicked in. The news of Riley's disappearance had only sent her head pounding harder. CJ knew there was nothing she could do - she was stuck here in this tiny room until further notice, and she had no other choice but to be patient and wait. John's hands on her back were attempting to soothe her, so CJ shut her eyes. But she could not relax; her mind was reeling at an unchecked pace, buzzing like a neon light that was on the verge of burning out. It wouldn't be long now, CJ wryly thought to herself, because she didn't think she could take much more.  
  
~*~  
  
Jack Tarver had been driving for the Greyhound Bus Line nearly twenty years, and he'd seen his fair share of excitement. He loved traveling, seeing different cities, and he loved driving the bus. This day had started like any other, his new schedule taking him down south. The last stop on this route was in Crawford, Texas. They weren't due to arrive there until tomorrow evening, and Jack couldn't wait to get started. The bus left DC at eleven o'clock sharp, the seats only half full. There were some older riders, mostly asleep, and a few business travelers. The last passenger to board the bus was an adorable little boy, tall for his age with a familiar, dimpled smile. He carried a backpack and took a seat near the front next to a window. Jack paid him little attention after ripping his ticket in half.  
  
It was Jack's practice to keep the radio on up front, softly enough so as not to disturb the passengers, but loud enough so he could follow the traffic reports. They had been driving for a mere ten minutes when the news came through about the assassination attempt. As a die-hard Democrat, Jack was relieved that the President had not been killed - after his relief passed, a bit of annoyance set in. The bus routes in and out of Manhattan were going to be delayed all day long, and Jack had buddies on those rotations.  
  
The news about the shooting grew repetitive, so Jack switched his radio off and focused on the road. They'd gotten out of Washington D.C. fairly quickly, missing a lot of the rush hour traffic - Jack liked leaving later in the morning. They'd been on the road for nearly an hour before reaching a Virginia bus station. It would be a fifteen minute stop, with time for new passengers to board and the current passengers to hop off and take a break. Jack was planning to go and buy a soda.  
  
Most of the passengers filed off the bus and moved to use the bus station restroom. It was a cool morning, with just a hint of the coming spring. Jack watched until everyone, excluding the dimpled young boy, exited the bus. Closing the doors, Jack stroked his white mustache as he headed for the vending machines. He'd been at this station before, and the machines were located inside, near the restrooms in the waiting area. Strolling in, Jack gave a friendly smile to the ticket booth employees before fishing out a dollar. He was really craving a cold Mountain Dew when he caught sight of the television.  
  
Expecting the same news about the assassination attempt, Jack was surprised to hear talk of a missing child - the President's son! Keeping his eyes on the television set, Jack fed his dollar bill to the machine. As the cold bottle clattered down the chute and landed with a thump at the bottom, Riley Hoynes' photograph was put up on the screen.  
  
Jack's jaw dropped and immediately he bolted out of the waiting room, completely abandoning his soda machine purchase. No wonder the boy on the bus seemed so familiar - Jack couldn't believe it. He ran outside and sprinted towards his bus, throwing the doors open. Riley Hoynes was no longer missing in action.  
  
~*~  
  
Donna Moss felt nauseated and jittery, but the doctor had assured her that everything was fine. The baby was unharmed, though Donna had been thrown down hard during the melee following the shooting. More than her own health, Donna was worried about Josh - he was stuck in Washington against his will, unable to get to her. Donna knew he was going crazy, worrying about the baby, his wife, and the shooting. His post traumatic stress disorder had never entirely gone away, and today's assassination attempt - targeting people very close to him - was likely sending Josh's senses into disarray. Josh didn't like to admit it, but he would never again deal well with the threat of bullets and guns.  
  
The television was on in the hospital room, and Donna had been trying hard to ignore it ever since she heard the news of Riley's disappearance. Donna's cell phone, which had been clipped to her belt, was lost in the post-gunfire crush. Without a way to contact CJ or the East Wing offices in Washington, Donna knew she was practically useless. She'd tried to get a phone brought to her room, but the hospital was too busy, bustling with the many people injured in the shooting. After her examination, finding a nurse had been next to impossible.  
  
Nearly twenty minutes later, a friendly but harried looking nurse's aide entered the room with a cordless phone. "Mrs. Lyman? We have your husband on the phone. Would you like to take it now?"  
  
Donna practically lunged across the room, snatching up the phone. "Josh! Oh, God, I'm so glad to hear your voice. I wanted to call you but I lost my phone - I didn't think you'd know how to get in touch with me, but don't worry, please, I'm fine!" Donna rambled out in a rush, catching her breath but barely.  
  
Josh's voice was heavy with concern. "I called Sam when I heard the news - it took him a while but he was finally able to track down which hospital people were being taken to - God, Donna, are you hurt? Is the baby okay? I'm going absolutely out of my mind here!"  
  
Donna sighed softly, her voice low and gentle. "Calm down, Josh. They checked me out, examined everything inside and out. The baby is fine, I'm fine. I have some cuts and bruises but that's it."  
  
"I heard CJ got really beat up," Josh murmured, trying not to recall a long- ago night in May. CJ had gotten hurt that night, too.  
  
Donna shook her head. "The motorcade was already long gone by the time I got back on my feet, so I have no idea. Josh," Donna said, dropping her voice, "are you going to be okay?"  
  
Josh swallowed the lump in his throat. That was his Donna, worried about him when she was the one in a hospital bed. "As long as the two of you are okay, I'm okay."  
  
Donna smiled with emotion, her eyes welling up. "Turn off the television, Josh, don't watch the news. It'll only make things worse."  
  
Josh sounded frazzled. "Did you know that Riley was missing?"  
  
Donna squeezed her eyes shut. "I heard."  
  
A moment of silence passed over the line before Josh's voice jumped again. "I'm going to come to you, Donna; as soon as the trains start running again, I'm going to be on my way. Don't do anything but lie there and rest."  
  
Donna finally realized the extent of her exhaustion. Her emotions were shot, her head was pounding, and being pregnant was draining her body of energy. She closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillows. "I love you," she murmured. Sleep was not far off.  
  
"I love you, too, Donnatella, so just sit tight."  
  
Donna hung the phone up and let her drowsiness take over. Maybe when she woke up, the world would be back in order.  
  
~*~  
  
After having a tearful conversation with her daughter by phone, CJ was only more of an emotional wreck. John never liked it when his wife was weepy and upset; he'd never really learned how to handle it, how to make things better. It was part of the problem they'd been having lately, while trying to put their marriage back together. As John sat across from her and held CJ's clammy hands in his, he wondered if after today, those problems would even exist.  
  
"CJ, when they find him, we'll go home and pack some things. We'll take a vacation, I promise, and it'll be wonderful," he murmured, bringing her fingers to his lips for a gentle kiss. "And no matter what happens, I love you."  
  
CJ took a deep, heavy breath as she looked up at John. "If we survive this day with our family in one piece, I don't even know what I'll do."  
  
"We'll celebrate," John replied quietly, squeezing her hands.  
  
CJ swallowed, tears threatening to spill over. Her eyes were red- rimmed and bloodshot as it was. "I think we've been taking the good things in our lives for granted."  
  
"I know I took you for granted," John softly replied, honesty coming to the surface. They were both too frazzled for lies. "When I felt us growing apart, it was like I decided we could never go back. I gave up and forgot how amazing you really are."  
  
CJ gave her husband half of a smile. "All this time, I didn't know how I was going to give in and forgive you." Her expression dropped. "But, hell, John, when those guns started firing this morning, the one and only thing on my mind was losing you. I knew I wasn't going to be able to bear it."  
  
John briefly closed his eyes, blinking away the moisture. "That's the same feeling I've been having for three weeks, now."  
  
CJ's laughter sounded more like a sob, and she inched herself closer to John. "Let's put everything in the past," she whispered in a tiny voice. "I care too much about you to hold a grudge forever."  
  
John dropped CJ's hands and slid his arms around her body, elated at her words. Worry and fear over Riley still lingered in both their minds, but a heavy load was being lifted. John pressed his lips to CJ's ear, squeezing her tightly. "I know I'll be apologizing to you for a very long time, but I feel like a very lucky man right now."  
  
CJ smiled softly, and leaned her head against John's as they sat together. She knew they'd have so much more to talk about later, when the situation wasn't so stressful. But for now, the icy walls had been broken down and they could focus on their problems together, as a team. It was going to take some time to grow back to the way they'd been, but CJ had a feeling it would now be possible.  
  
The door to the small, guarded room suddenly cracked open. Ron Butterfield entered, a new expression on his face. John and CJ immediately stood up, their eyes full of questioning. Butterfield broke into a smile, his voice light. "Mr. President, we've got your son, and he's safe and sound."  
  
~*~  
  
The White House had never looked so good to Riley Hoynes. He knew he was going to have a lot of explaining to do, but for now it seemed that his parents were just relieved to have made it home. The six-year-old would take his punishment like a man and suffer for a good cause - it was quite clear that the tide and turned. His parents were talking, holding hands, acting genuinely affectionate and in love, like they always had. His plan had worked.  
  
As Riley walked down the hallway to his room, he figured he had put in a day's work and gotten some quality results. It had been worth the escape plan and the bus ride, even though he hadn't quite made it to the ranch in Texas. And it had certainly been exciting to see all the police cars, sirens blaring, as they came to pick him up. He'd even been on the television news. That was worth some bragging rights, Riley figured, even if they did come with a month's grounding.  
  
Riley opened the door to his room, looking forward to lying down in bed. It was late, nearing his normal bedtime, but breaking out of school had been hard work, and he hadn't eaten dinner. A snack and some sleep were definitely in order. Riley stepped into his bedroom, expecting the room to be empty, but finding his little sister instead. She looked annoyed as she stood on the rug, her pink nightgown bright and imposing, one fuzzy- slippered foot tapping.  
  
"They snatched me out of art class, you dork," Addy complained, her hands indignantly on her little hips. "The minute you went missing, they made me leave art class and come home!"  
  
"Well, it worked, didn't it? Mom and Dad aren't fighting anymore," Riley retorted, heading over to the dresser for his pajamas.  
  
Addy snorted softly and cocked her head, her curly pigtails bouncing . "I don't think it was because of you, Ri."  
  
Riley spun around sharply, offended. "What do you know? Nothing, that's what."  
  
Addy kept her cool. "I bet you didn't know about the shooting. Daddy said it was an assass.an assass."  
  
"An assassination attempt?" Riley cried, no longer interested in out- foxing his sister's logic. He hadn't heard about a shooting. "No way!"  
  
"Way. You being missing just caused everyone extra trouble," Addy scowled, sticking out her tongue. "You're lucky you didn't get spanked."  
  
Riley glanced at his sister and then at the door. His parents were probably out there waiting to knock him silly. "Well, the day isn't over yet."  
  
"I'm going to bed," Addy yawned heading for the door.  
  
"G'night, you little dimwit," Riley muttered, returning to the task of finding his pajamas. Despite the fact that he'd be in trouble in the morning, the boy was pretty proud of his successful escape plan. If the bus driver hadn't recognized his face, Riley knew he'd be halfway to Texas by now.  
  
Addy was partially out the door before she stopped and turned to her brother. Her eyes were shy, with curly brown ringlets falling in the way. "Hey, not for nothing, but I'm glad you're back."  
  
Riley grinned at his sister. "Yeah, next time, I'll take you with me."  
  
Addy just rolled her eyes and shut the door, leaving her renegade brother on his own. He was just plain crazy, and now everyone would know it.  
  
~*~  
  
Bruce Mayer was up to his ankles in wet sand. His blue swimming trunks were coated with the stuff, and the sun was just a little too bright for his tastes. Still, the President's Chief-of-Staff was in a good mood. When a shooting was combined with a missing child, the only possible outcome was a boost in the ratings. They'd dodged the bullet in more ways then one; the press seemed to have forgotten all about John's affair the minute something more interesting came along. The past month had been nerve wracking, and even though he was now stuck on a North Carolina beach with children, Bruce had to admit that he was enjoying the vacation. They all certainly deserved it.  
  
Sam Seaborn was crouched in a self-made moat, trying to dig it out deeper. He'd promised to build Riley and Addison the biggest sandcastle of their lives, and so far, it had been slow going. Riley was making frantic trips down to the water with a bucket in an attempt to fill the moat, and Addy was sitting demurely on the sand in her pink bathing suit, watching skeptically as the sand sucked up the water. The Secret Service agents were standing quietly around the private beach, amusedly watching the President's top advisors struggle to build things with sand.  
  
"You'd think this would be easier," Bruce grumbled, tossing more sand on the pile. Growing in size, the shapeless sand mountain that sat in the middle of the moat was going to be a magnificent castle - or so Sam said. "I mean, I don't see how this is ever going to have turrets and windows, Seaborn."  
  
North Carolina was having a warm March, and Sam's white t-shirt was damp. He looked up and brushed the dark hair out of his eyes. "If you talk like that, it's *never* going to have turrets and windows!" Sam cried good- naturedly. He turned and glanced at Addy, sitting pretty off to the side. She was doodling in the sand with her shovel, and she looked a bit bored. "We *have* to do this, Bruce. I told the kids it would be perfect."  
  
"Man, you've got to stop lying to children." Bruce rolled his eyes and continued to add sand to the pile.  
  
Sam threw a bit more dirt out of the moat and walked around the entire thing, satisfied. "What do you think Riley, is this good enough?"  
  
The tall, dark-haired boy stopped and poured more water into the moat. It was immediately absorbed, the bottom of the moat damp but empty. "I think it needs to be deeper, or it's never going to be like a *real* moat, Sam."  
  
Bruce groaned. "Let's start on the castle, instead. Otherwise, we'll be digging this stupid hole all day."  
  
Excited that they were finally going to start making the castle, Addy stood and scampered over to her brother. "Can I decorate it with seashells?"  
  
"Not yet, dimwit," Riley rolled his eyes, poking his sister in the side. "Wait until it's more than just an ugly pile of sand."  
  
Sam climbed out of the sizeable moat and grabbed his 'sculpting tool'. Bruce's jaw dropped. "Hey! Is that my hair brush??"  
  
Riley covered his mouth and Addy's little shoulders jumped with giggles. Sam shrugged casually, holding up the wide, black-handled brush. "Don't worry, Bruce, I'm not going to use the bristles. The back of it will make a great smoothing tool, though."  
  
"Oh my God," Bruce muttered, walking around the huge sand pile. The agents were doing a horrible job hiding their laughter, and Bruce smirked at them before turning back to Sam. "Okay, let's go, Picasso. Let's see your best sandcastle."  
  
Sam gave Bruce a friendly sneer, and then turned towards Riley and Addy. He gave them a proud, confident grin before focusing seriously on the high pile of sand. Sam leaned forward and began to carefully smooth the sand with the back of Bruce's hairbrush, taking long strokes down the mountain. His plan was to shape it up into a realistic tower and build turrets and real windows. Maybe they'd even have a bridge and a cascading set of stairs.  
  
"Uh, Sam.." Bruce chuckled, watching as sand toppled down the other side of the pile, effectively filling up one half of the moat.  
  
Sam stopped 'smoothing' the sand for a moment in order to appraise the destruction. "Aww, crap."  
  
Riley rolled his eyes and moved to begin re-digging the moat. He looked up at Sam, his eyes full of annoyance. "Dude, don't quit your day job."  
  
~*~  
  
CJ leaned back against John's chest as they stood by the window. John had one arm around her waist, the other holding back the curtain. The house was beautiful and spacious, with a door that opened right out onto the beach. The weather was perfect, and CJ and John could not have been more relaxed now that Bruce and Sam had taken the kids outside.  
  
"Oh, oh, oh, look, it's gonna fall again," CJ giggled, groaning as Sam's handiwork fell apart before their eyes. She found the entire scene hysterical. "That's the third time!"  
  
John chuckled heartily, tightening his arm around CJ's waist as he leaned his head against her shoulder. "Addy looks like she's about to cry."  
  
CJ laughed harder. "Riley's going to get so mad. Sam promised turrets."  
  
John pressed his lips against CJ's hair and sighed. "I like it. No matter how many times the castle keeps falling down, they're not giving up. They're just going to keep re-building it until it works out."  
  
CJ smiled at John's little proverb and slipped around until she could face her husband. Letting the curtain fall across the window, John looked down into CJ's expression. She slid her arms around John's shoulders and focused on his eyes. "While they rebuild their castle," she murmured seriously, "we ought to start working on ours. I think I'm really ready."  
  
John moved his hands down CJ's back, gently tugging her closer until their foreheads rested together. "I love you," he whispered, "and you should never forget that. What happened before is all in the past and I'm glad you're ready to forgive me and move on. I never wanted to force this or rush you, but you have to know how badly I wanted us to be happy again."  
  
CJ briefly closed her eyes before gazing back at John. "I just needed some time, that's all." Softly, she brought her lips to his, the first real kiss they'd shared in weeks.  
  
John caught his breath as they slowly parted, unprepared for the emotional depth involved in pressing their mouths together again. He gently cupped her face with his hands and felt his eyes growing moist. "God, Claudia, I don't know what I was thinking. I'm never wanted to be anywhere else."  
  
CJ smiled softly and nodded, stealing another taste of John's mouth. "Let's not look back," she suggested, wrapping herself around her husband.  
  
Without an inch of space between their bodies and CJ's lips on his, John's body was starting to crave more. Sliding his hands down her sides until they rested on her hips, John searched CJ's eyes. "What do you want right now? It's all up to you, Sweetheart. You're in charge here."  
  
CJ liked the sound of that, appreciative of the space and time he was willing to give her. And having planned to take a slower approach to things, CJ was surprised to find herself seriously considering moving to the bedroom. Something had clicked into place, and there was no denying what was going to happen. It was a huge step, they both knew, and if they made love today, there would be no going back.  
  
CJ briefly looked away from John to move the curtain aside. The sunlight shone through and they had a prime view of the sandcastle. It was still just a huge lump of sand eroding into a poor excuse of a moat. The First Couple choked on a laugh and then turned to each other. CJ cocked her head. "How much time do you think we have?"  
  
John grinned and took another look out the window. "Oh, at least another hour."  
  
CJ chuckled and took her husband's hand. "Let's go."  
  
~*~  
  
Riley was tired, and his sister had long since lost interest in the castle. And after it had fallen down half-a-dozen times, Riley couldn't really say he blamed her. Addy was now half-way down the beach with one of the female agents, combing for shells and other goodies. Sam was sitting inside of the moat, angrily trying to keep the sand in some semblance of a pile. Bruce was sitting on a towel, trying to pick the dirt out of his hairbrush.  
  
"You guys suck," Riley suddenly proclaimed. He wished he had a camera. "I'm going inside."  
  
Both men looked up sharply, their voices coming at the same time. "No!"  
  
Riley raised a brow, watching as Sam climbed out of the moat. "You can't go inside yet, Buddy."  
  
Bruce had joined them, glancing at his Deputy. There was no way they were going into that house until well past dinner time - CJ and John were going to need all the privacy they could get this weekend. "Yeah, no, not a good idea, Riley."  
  
Riley glared at the men. "Why not? Your sandcastle totally blows, my sister has abandoned me, and I'm hungry."  
  
Bruce nodded, the perfect distraction popping into his head. "Well, in that case, we'd better walk into town. I know a really great pizza parlor, and it's right next to an ice cream shop."  
  
Sam nodded profusely. "I'm in. Riley?"  
  
Riley considered his options, and pizza with lousy castle-builders sounded better than sitting inside the beach house. "Let's get Addy."  
  
"Go ahead, we'll wait," Bruce instructed, pointing at the little girl, who off in the distance was still searching out pretty shells.  
  
As Riley took off sprinting down the beach, Bruce and Sam sighed. "Good diversion. I know I'm certainly not going back into that house until we make sure that the President and First Lady are fully dressed," Sam chuckled.  
  
Bruce smirked, watching the kids as they began to run back towards them. "Well, if they're happily back together when we get home, I think everyone will be able to get over your disaster of a sandcastle."  
  
Sam looked sheepishly over at the construction site. It looked like there had been a sand explosion. "Well, maybe I need some practice."  
  
Bruce chuckled. He had no response for Sam as the kids ran up to them, out of breath. The heavyset man grinned at Addy and Riley as he pointed towards the town. "Ice cream and pizza - let's go!"  
  
~*~  
  
CJ didn't think her body was ever going to stop vibrating. She was sweaty and exhausted after the third time John had made her come, and after a break, CJ knew she'd want more. As she clung to John's torso, she tried to catch her breath and remember a time they'd done it better. "Oh, wow.."  
  
John chuckled, running his hands gently through CJ's hair. He'd intended on making slow love to her the first time, but it had all gotten wildly out of control as soon as he'd put his lips on her body. CJ had become instantly irresistible and the sex had turned frantic, almost rough. John hadn't been prepared for how good it felt to sink into her body again, and after so long apart, CJ didn't want it slow.  
  
"You okay?" he asked softly, his fingers walking down her bare back. He could feel CJ's erratic breathing, and he was slightly worried that he'd hurt her.  
  
She grinned against his skin and pressed a kiss to his chest. "I'm wonderful," she sighed happily. "Let's do it again," she said suddenly, eagerness in her eyes as she lifted her head.  
  
John laughed and pulled CJ closer to him. Kissing her mouth tenderly, he squeezed her tight. "Give me a minute," he grinned. "Let's just talk."  
  
CJ closed her eyes. "I love you," she murmured, instantly aware that it was the first time she'd said the words in a very long time. Her eyes watered a bit as she buried her head into John's shoulder, repeating the words. "I love you, John."  
  
John felt his heart swell up. He didn't care about anything - not the Presidency, not his own political power, not the future. He just cared about this moment, this instant, where he was finally connected to his wife. It meant so much; it was so emotional, and so perfect. Over the course of ten years, they'd been through so much together and shared countless memories. The victories, the triumphs, the amazing moments and the tragic ones - they'd made it through and survived. John had never really doubted that they could do it again.  
  
"I am so happy right now," John whispered, inhaling the soft scent of CJ's shampoo. "You have no idea what you mean to me."  
  
CJ closed her eyes and settled into John's embrace. "In two years, when we leave the White House, can we go back to Texas and just spend every day like this?"  
  
John, too, closed his eyes. It was so comfortable, so comforting, to be able to lay like this with CJ. John knew it would last forever. "Every day," he agreed lazily, stroking her shoulder. "Every day."  
  
END 


End file.
